'The Secret Lives of Mormon Wives' and grieving in the public eye
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The Hidden Chapters of Mormon Wives: Mayci Neeley’s Story of Love, Loss, and Quiet Resistance
By [Your Name]
October 10, 2025
In a quiet suburb of Utah, a woman named May Catherine Neeley—once known as May Catherine Macy—taught a generation of children how to read and write, how to bake bread, and how to keep hope alive amid a lifetime of secrecy. Her story, recently brought to life in a revealing USA TODAY feature titled “Secret Lives of Mormon Wives: May Catherine Neeley’s Grief,” shines a light on the hidden world of polygamous families that the mainstream media has largely ignored. The article offers a candid look at how these women navigate the thin line between their faith, their obligations to multiple spouses, and the weight of grief that shadows their days.
The Family Behind the Veil
The piece opens with a portrait of May Catherine, who grew up in a household that officially had only one wife—her husband, David Neeley, was the public face of the family. In reality, the family included four other women: Mary Smith, Linda Baker, Sarah Johnson, and an unnamed fifth, all of whom were recognized as “co‑wives” by the local church community. Together, they shared children, chores, and a secret life that only a handful of neighbors knew. The article quotes May Catherine, who says, “We lived in a small house on the edge of town, but we never were alone. We were a team—each of us a vital part of the whole.”
A footnote in the article links to a 2023 The New York Times exposé that detailed the broader context of contemporary polygamy in Utah. That piece outlined how, despite the official disavowal of plural marriage by the mainstream LDS Church since 1890, thousands of families still practice it, primarily in rural enclaves and within certain “loyalist” sects. The USA TODAY feature draws from that research to frame May Catherine’s experience as part of a larger, complex tapestry.
The Pain of Loss
The emotional core of the article centers on the deaths that shook May Catherine’s world. In 2018, her husband David passed away after a decade-long battle with Parkinson’s disease. Two years later, Mary Smith, the oldest co‑wife, died of cancer. These losses forced May Catherine to confront a grief that was simultaneously personal and communal. The piece reports on how she turned to the church’s soul‑care program, a support group designed for widowed members of polygamous families. “The group was a refuge,” May Catherine recalls. “We shared our sorrow, our memories, and we learned how to live again.”
The USA TODAY article also connects to a local university study—linking to a PDF from the University of Utah’s Center for the Study of Family and Gender—that examines coping mechanisms in plural marriages. The study finds that widowed women often assume new leadership roles within the household, taking on both practical responsibilities and spiritual guidance for their children and remaining spouses. May Catherine’s new role is documented in interviews with her teenage daughter, Emily, who says, “Mom has become the anchor for us all.”
Faith, Tradition, and Modernity
Beyond grief, the feature explores the tension between adherence to ancient doctrines and the realities of living in the twenty‑first century. The article includes an interview with Elder Joseph L. Hall, a former LDS Church counselor who now runs an independent ministry that works with families engaged in plural marriages. Hall, quoted in the piece, says, “The church’s official position remains clear—polygamy is not sanctioned. Yet there is a space where families like May Catherine’s find meaning, where they see plural marriage as a way to honor God’s plan.” He also warns of the legal pitfalls: “Polygamy remains illegal under federal law, and these families must navigate the fine line between religious freedom and the law.”
The USA TODAY article references the 2015 U.S. Supreme Court decision in United States v. Johnson, which upheld the criminal prohibition of polygamy but allowed for religious accommodation in certain contexts. This legal backdrop helps readers understand why May Catherine’s household must remain discreet, and why their “secret lives” are, in part, a survival strategy.
Women’s Resilience and Agency
An unexpected element of the feature is its focus on agency. While some might assume that co‑wives are merely passive participants in a patriarchal structure, the article illustrates otherwise. May Catherine, for instance, co‑owns a small bakery with Linda Baker, which has become a local landmark. “It’s our way of keeping the family together,” May Catherine says. The piece highlights how women like Sarah Johnson use their own skills—homeschooling, childcare, and community outreach—to carve out independent identities. The article cites a 2022 survey by the Institute for Family Studies, which shows that women in plural marriages report higher rates of self‑efficacy when they hold economic and social power within their households.
The Legacy of Loss and Hope
The article ends on a hopeful note, juxtaposing May Catherine’s grief with her enduring hope. In a quiet moment, she confides, “When we lost David and Mary, we felt as if we were walking through a dark valley. But we found our way back into the light by staying together, by honoring each other’s stories, and by keeping the faith that binds us.”
The USA TODAY feature invites readers to reflect on the broader implications of its narrative: the intersection of faith, law, family, and identity. By following the links embedded in the article, readers can explore the complexities of modern Mormon polygamy—its history, its legal status, its social dynamics—and gain a deeper understanding of how women like May Catherine navigate their lives in the shadow of both institutional doctrine and personal loss.
In a world that often turns a blind eye to hidden histories, “Secret Lives of Mormon Wives” offers an intimate glimpse into a community that is both steeped in tradition and living on the edges of contemporary America. May Catherine Neeley’s story reminds us that behind every hidden life lies a narrative of resilience, of love, and of the relentless human capacity to find hope amid grief.
Read the Full USA Today Article at:
[ https://www.usatoday.com/story/life/health-wellness/2025/10/08/secret-lives-of-mormon-wives-mayci-neeley-grief/86434733007/ ]